Why do we fight?

I have heard about a new book that has people fighting again. It is call The Feminine Mistake: Are We Giving Up Too Much? by Leslie Bennetts.

It is another book telling moms who stay home that they are making a mistake. She write about how these women have put themselves at a disadvantage by staying home. If anything should happen (divorce, death), the woman does not have any income to fall back from. She has to go out and find a job, probably sell the house and downsize her life a great deal. All of which I think is true.

But on the other hand, I think that even when you are married and have 2 incomes you have the same concerns. If something happened to either one of you, you would face the same problems. Let's face it. As Americans, if we have more money, we spend it. We do not save it. So all of the same problems would pop up.

She also talks about women who stayed home the whole time their kids were in school. She mentions that they felt empty and experienced loss and grief.

I can very much see where that happens. I sometimes stuggle with those feelings when my kids do something new and it just makes them that much more grown up. And what mother (or father for that matter) would not be upset by their kids moving on with their lives apart from them.

My biggest issue with this is why do women have to fight about who is doing it right. We are all doing it right. No two people are the same and there no one solution is right for everyone. Let us just say that my staying home is right for me. And my sister working hard in a law firm is right for her. She would not want to do my job everyday just like I would not like hers.

Life is about choices. Make them, be confident in your decisions. But do not try to make decisions for others. It does not do anyone any good.